So, you’re in the situation where you’re walking with a widower. You met through online dating, in a restaurant, through one of many dating apps, on social media, whatever. They’re a little older and calmer and seem more ‘calm’ and confident in themselves than many other people that you’ve been with, precisely because they’ve had many life experiences and they’re still in the grieving process. Still, you’re looking for a sign, or 5 signs, that the widower is serious with you and really loves you.
You keep asking questions like “How do you know if a widower loves you and how long it takes for a widower to fall in love?”, “Are you just a trigger for them to get over their deceased spouse”, “Is the widower’s behavior a sign that they’re serious about you and the relationship?”, and more.
Keep reading this article and don’t lose heart. We’re here to dig deep and help you discover 5 warning signs that a widower is serious about your relationship.
How Do You Know If A Widower Loves You?
How to know if someone loves you is a rather loaded question. After all, everyone has a different way of saying and showing how they feel about another person . There’s no single way to show love and commitment. We’re all different and we all show our feelings differently.
Some people make big romantic gestures, shower you with gifts and roses, and then, after love bombing you, they can disappear.
Others, on the other hand, prefer smaller, more intimate gestures, simple little things, and they don’t show it too much, but they love you, and they’re always there.
A widower’s behavior could tell you a lot that they’re slowly but surely getting serious about you and want to build a healthy relationship. Maybe they’ll introduce you to their children Or, maybe they’ll start to open up to you more. Maybe they’ve already done all that. Carefully read these 5 signs that indicate a widower wants a serious relationship with you.
5 signs that a widower is serious about your relationship
We’re aware that a widower always needs time to open up and show their true emotions. They feel and keep a lot of things inside themselves, which they’re not ready to share with you. They may wonder how you’ll accept them and everything related to them. However, let’s get to work and talk about the specific signs that they’re deeply invested in you and committed to building a relationship that will last.
Just going out with a widower isn’t a big deal. However, you’ll have to work hard to build trust in the relationship if you want it to be something serious. Let’s look at 5 signs that a widower is serious about your relationship.
- They talk about their life and their grief, but they don’t let it affect their relationship with you
The widower you like has fond memories of their first wife or first husband. You might see this as a drag, but it simply gives you and your relationship an advantage. Understand that, when they share these memories with you, they want everything to be clear, so you don’t doubt them or their intentions.
When it comes to a deceased partner, there’s a lot of emotional baggage that both you and your widower partner will have to deal with. As we said, the best relationships can come with luggage, but it takes a special kind of patience and great willpower to overcome this.
One of the 5 signs that a widower is serious about your relationship is that, although they fondly remember their initial partner, they’re not so preoccupied with their grief and loss that they’re unable to establish a healthy attachment to you and your relationship. They’ll always have respect for the love of his life, and the only way to accomplish that is with you right now.
Keep in mind, if they’re constantly saying nasty things about their past partner, it’s definitely a red flag for a new relationship. Sure, on the surface we like to hear some obscene things about our partner’s ex, but running the negativities over repeatedly with a new woman or a new man no longer sounds like someone you’d like to be with in the long run. That tells you a lot, so let’s hope your widower isn’t that type of person.
How much it takes a widower to fall in love is a tricky question. For your part, respect what memories they have and perhaps the children they shared with another partner. Part of them are always somewhere else, but with patience you can endure it all. You should be aware of that as soon as you enter into such a relationship.
When a widower talks about their late wife or late husband, pay attention to what they say, how they say it, and how often they mention them. Be gentle, give them time, and perhaps encourage counseling if you think it’s necessary. Don’t pressure them to do anything they may not be ready for, but some gentle suggestion won’t hurt.
Remember: There’s no harm or problem in anything, say everything you think and feel.
2. They’re sincerely interested in your life
It’s easy for a widower to be completely wrapped up in themselves. Their grief, their loss, and if they have children and raise them alone, can be impermeable to anything beyond their immediate responsibilities and orbit. There’s nothing wrong with a widower focusing on themselves and their children, of course. Remember, their children have only them and it wasn’t easy what they went through. You have to show your understanding.
However, if they’re not selfish, and are constantly interested in your life, how you feel, and what you think about your relationship, then this is a good sign.
If you’re looking for a long-term and loving relationship or if you want to marry a widower and live in their house, you must be sure that they’re ready to be with you and with you all the time.
In any relationship, it’s important to be recognized and accepted as you are, for all that you are. If you’re dating a widower, you need to be especially careful that they don’t expect you to be like their ex-partner, just someone who can raise their children, or be the ideal daughter-in-law or son-in-law. You’ll find this out on the first date.
Do they ask you about your day? Are they interested in your hobbies, your job, and what do you want from the relationship? They want to know everything about you because they love you or because they want you to fit into their life to make it whole.
3. Their procedures are on a par with their words
Sounds pretty basic, doesn’t it? Of course, we all know that words, although very important, can simply be beautiful. However, today anyone can say “I love you” right? Actions are really important, the small things and the big things.
Times when they try to make you happy and take care of you is definitely one of the 5 signs that a widower is serious about your relationship. Actions are more important than words, and that tells you a lot.
Words must accompany deeds, because otherwise they remain empty. It can promise you everything, but offer nothing. Positive actions towards you on his part will remove all your doubts and fears that you have. So be brave and start believing, of course if he deserves it. Lol.
4.They introduce you to their family
Okay, this says it all doesn’t it? You don’t need to go beyond this. If anyone is ready to introduce you to their family, to most important people, this means that you no longer need to doubt anything. It says that they love and respect you and that they can’t wait to introduce you to their loved ones. So relax and enjoy it, maybe you get to the stage of looking at family photos too!
How do you know if a widower loves you? Well, they’ll introduce you to the people who are important to them. Their children, their close friends, their parents, and so on. The behavior of a widower in love is the behavior of a person who’s willing to move on and risk all thet they have. He will be happy to involve you in all your life activities and relationships. There are no half measures here.
5. They talk openly about the future
This is a pretty basic principle for any romantic relationship, but more so when you’re dealing with someone who loved and lost a partner. If you’re planning to marry a widower and live in their house, do a lot of checks to make sure the two of you are thinking the same way.
It’s true that every relationship runs into an obstacle when you want different things. However, if a person who has been through a lot of bad things plans to move on with you, that says it all. It says that they’re not afraid of the future, and that they want to spend it with you. Life hasn’t stopped, has it?
The truth is they lost someone so close and dear to them, and they had plans for the future. On the other hand, if they’re not talking about future vacations, moving in together, and so on, or refusing to participate in that conversation at all, maybe it’s time to figure out how to move on. You feel it’s time to start making more serious things happen.
There’s a chance you might change your mind, and how wonderful it would be if you could. However, don’t spend too much time on a person who doesn’t want the same things as you.
FAQs About Dating A Widower When The Relationship Is Serious
1. Is it okay to talk about their late wife or late husband?
When you go out with a widower, you should never pressure them for information about their deceased wife or deceased husband. While it would sometimes be pleasant for them to talk about her or him, there might come a time when you’ll notice how embarrassed they are! It’s best to avoid this topic if possible and focus on growing the relationship instead. Especially if you’re at the beginning. Let them talk for themselves when they feel the best time to do it.
2. Is it okay to introduce them to your family?
Introducing a widower to your family is a big step in any relationship! This can be annoying, especially when your family members may not approve of them because they’re a widower or may not understand what you’re going through. However, if you’re sure that’s it, then you don’t have a shrewd answer you know.
3. How do I show a widower that I care about them?
When you go out with a widower, it can become difficult to figure out how best to express your care and love for them. Be what you are, show how you feel. Make sure you listen to what they have to say, support the decisions they make, and show that you enjoy spending time with them! If you make a little effort, it will probably be far in terms of showing your affection.
4. What can I do if their children don’t accept me?
Nothing’s more important than the happiness of your widower and the happiness of their children. If you notice that there’s a division between them and their children because they don’t approve of your relationship, maybe it’s time to cancel things! It’s always better to leave than to stay and fight to make things work. However, of course, with conversation some things can be resolved. So don’t rush and be hasty.
If you’re struggling as a new partner to a widow/widower, the biggest question you have to ask yourself is, are you really ready to accept that the person you’re dating will, on some level, always love and care for the person who died. Who will be their number one? You or their late spouse
Can you believe, on an intellectual and emotional level, that their love for the person who died doesn’t take away from the love they have for you? Can you just take it all in?
Determining whether a widow or widower is interested in you can take time. As you get to know each other, you’ll learn how they deal with certain situations and at what pace, and whether it will work.
If you’re both widowed, you’ll no doubt be sensitive to each other’s feelings and won’t want to continue the relationship if it doesn’t feel right. The suffering you both experienced has probably left a depth of compassion, and that’s hard. Talking about the future is the best way to determine where the relationship is going.
Ultimately, the hope is that dating a widow or widower will lead to a valuable relationship that can develop over time. If this is the case, it’ll be because you have understood each other more deeply.
As well, if you’re gentle and open to learning more, you may find that their memories and connections with that past person forms another beautiful layer of them that you can get to know through stories and memories. If you can accept all that because you love them, and after this article all your insecurities are gone, you have nothing left to wait for. Let true love win. Be ready for a new life that brings new love which may also bring a wedding ring and create new memories.
On the other hand, by starting a relationship with a widower, you’re letting someone else’s tragedy into your life. Don’t hope that one day it’ll end and you’ll become ordinary people. The pain of loss will forever remain a part of your loved one, and thus to some extent a part of you. It’s kind of normal, if you’re not ready, it’s better to let them go right away. Break up on time, without wasting your time and theirs. If you’re still sure of your choice, be patient. The road is long and difficult. We wish you all the possible happiness with your loved one.