In a perfect world a recipe for a happy marriage should sound like this: 4 cups of genuine Love, 2 cups of Understanding; 2 cups of Friendship, 2 cups of Loyalty; 2 cups of Faith and Trust in each other; pinch of Forgiveness and/or Blindness; Dash of …. But it is not that simple as the recipe for happy marriage actually does not exist as each person needs to find its own way of finding and striving for such a thing.
What happens when marriage is not happy
Divorce happens when two persons are not involved in a happy marriage actually when they are not happy with each other. According to various studies, the most common reasons for initiating divorce are: lack of commitment, infidelity, irreconcilable differences; lack of intimacy; constant arguing, lack of shared interests, etc.
The lack of certain signs can show you whether you are involved in a healthy relationship or not.
Data shows that the majority of divorces are initiated by women which allude that divorces are affected by woman role changes and expectations in society.
Going back in time due to disparity in earnings and the fact that most of the women had been ,,stay home moms’’, women had stayed in unhealthy marriages just to obtain economic stability. Moving forward with the process of education many women got involved with the lucrative jobs and positions that allowed them to feel more courageous and aware of its quality and possibilities. Therefore, this created an atmosphere that led to a large rise in divorce rates and a decline in marriage rates.
According to the statistics published by the renowned law firm from New York, US that is specialized for family law global divorce rates look like this: Luxembourg: 87%, Spain: 65%, France: 55%,Russia: 51%, United States: 46%, Germany: 44%, United Kingdom: 42%, etc. The entire study as well as the overview of divorce phenomena can be seen here.
What to do ,,to make’’ marriage happy (again)
Pursuant to many researches completed with regards to this topic prove that it is absolutely possible to make marriage happy (again).
If you really want to make your marriage happy (again), here are some recommendations that can help you tremendously improve your marriage:
7. Work on Yourself
Try to understand what and why is bothering you. If you think deep enough you might find out that some, if not most of the ,,troubling’’ things are not that important and not worth ruining your marriage at all. For some things we just have a habit of getting mad about, while they can be simply ,,overheard’’ or ,,overseen’’.
The most important thing here is to be absolutely honest with yourself as that is the only way it will take you to the truth – and that is what you are searching for!
6. Recipe for a happy marriage: Meditate
Meditation is a way to connect with yourself and through a better connection to self, create better connections with others.
Meditation helps us to see the contents of our minds and hearts, to understand the way we define the world and the pain we carry around with greater clarity, compassion, and acceptance. Meditation has the power to transform our relationship for the better. It teaches us about forgiveness, compassion and acceptance. Just 20 minutes a day can help us to sleep better, to feel less stressed and more positive and motivated.
5. Exercise Forgiveness
The first ground-rule for this exercise is: You are not doing this to change your partner. Your task is to change yourself and to do your part to improve the relationship.
The second ground-rule is this: Your task is not to pressure your partner into these exercises. It is better if both of you are drawn to them, not pushed into them.
When you change yourself you might see that partner is changing as well as he/she might be relieved that you stopped doing things that used to bother him/her,
4. Focus on the Positives
Try to be more positive in general. Be the one who will initiate positiveness as positive attracts positive! Compliment your partner for everything that you love about him/her. Reminiscence of all those things you admired at the beginning of your romance will tremendously improve your relationship, while at the same time each of you need to avoid unnecessary criticism that most of the time ignites arguing that no one likes.
Using healthy relationship quotes can significantly help you to see your partner in a more loving way and assist you while and when you are going through the hard times!
3. Recipe for happy marriage: Spend More Time Together
Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.
Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction a great deal.
It has been extremely challenging to spend quality time during quarantine and pandemic… couples have been faced with an additional amount of stress being frightened by the uncertainty of Covid-19 fears, but scientists have found numerous tips and advice for this special occasion.
2. Be Generous With One Another
Generosity between spouses is a key element to a happy marriage. Generosity is the amount of giving that goes on within a relationship, which can mean anything from making your spouse a cup of coffee, to ordering flowers or providing a backrub.
Many studies have shown that couples who reported a high amount of generosity in their relationship were five times more likely to say their marriage was “very happy,” compared with those who reported a low amount of generosity.
1. ,,Hold On Tight’’ – and find your way back to love and intimacy
Enjoying a loving connection with your partner is a vital need for all couples. Each one of us needs an accessible and responsive partner, and we do best when we can depend on our partner for nurturing, protection and fun.
It is ok to go sideways sometimes but it is important to understand that we have to fight for ourselves – actually for our partners and all we have dreamed of at one point. We certainly have not made such important decisions for no reason! We all know that marriages are very difficult and that simple leaving is the easiest way out. At the end of the day it is worthwhile to do all you can to get back your loved one and make it better, nicer and more enjoyable. And that is a recipe for a happy marriage!