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17 Warning Signs A Married Man Is Using You

17 Warning Signs A Married Man Is Using You

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When you’re in love, it’s natural that you don’t see anything bad in your significant other, so there’s a small chance that you’ll notice any sure signs a married man is using you. However, there will come a point where you realize something’s wrong.

Being used by a married man is one of the worst feelings any woman can feel, especially when you know that you have been completely honest in your relationship from the beginning. Find out below what are the most common warning signs a married man is using you.

Signs a married man is using you – How do you know if a married man is using you?

As mentioned before, sometimes you don’t see clear signs a married man is using you, that something isn’t functioning in your relationship. That’s why we’re here to help you recognize it. Here are some of the sure signs that a married man is using you.

sad girl

17. He’s avoiding an eye contact

The eyes should be the first place you look at when trying to figure out if a married man is using you. When a man loves you, he wants to look at you all the time. He appreciates you, your looks, and your behavior. He wants to look at your smile and to have continuous eye contact with you.

man avoiding an eye contact

So, when he’s avoiding making eye contact with you, you can be sure that he’s hiding something. 

16. He’s never on your side

You told him about a problem you had at work with your co-worker and you’re hundred percent right on the measures that you took. You’re right to expect him to be on your side even if you did something wrong. He should take your side and try to cheer you up.

Instead, if he took your co-worker’s side and said he believes you did the wrong thing even though you explained the whole situation, you would be right to assume that he’s using you.

he is never on your side

15. He doesn’t plan the future with you

When you try to talk about the future plans, how does your married man react? Does he show any interest? Does he often mention a breakup? If he doesn’t seem interested and avoids talking about the future together, it’s a red flag to end your relationship.

he doesn't plan future with you

14. You don’t know anyone close to him

As time passes, every couple wants to get to know each other better. That includes meeting each other’s family members and friends.

If you and your partner have been together for a long time and you still haven’t met any of his family members, it’s a pretty good sign he doesn’t see your relationship as something important and serious. 

you don't know his friends

Obviously, he doesn’t consider your relationship a committed relationship, and a breakup is waiting around the corner. 

13. He’s selfish

One of the most obvious signs a married man is using you is his selfish behavior. What do you do in your free time? Does he seek validation that he’s the best of whatever you talk about?

If he has never asked you how you feel, and all he wants from you is to have sex, do yourself a favor and get away from him. If he has been behaving like that from the first place, believe me, he won’t change. That’s not true love.

12. You’re an ATM for him

Married men often find a woman and use her financially. If you think your married boyfriend is this type of man, analyze his behavior. Is he employed?

Does he ask you for money and never pay you back? Are you the one who pays for everything when you two go out?

If he does three out of four of these things, it’s a pretty good sign that all your married man wants from you is money. You don’t need another red flag to realize that this isn’t true love.

11. You’ve never been on a real date

If your meetings start and end in a bedroom, it’s obvious that he doesn’t see you as his girlfriend.

When a man (even a married man) loves his girlfriend so much and wants her by his side until the end of his life, he wants to show her to everyone and spend his free time with her.

you have never been on a real date

10. You don’t know any details about his life

If you try to get close to him and talk about your personal life other than your love life but he doesn’t seem interested in it and doesn’t open up about his life, you aren’t important to him.

He may be hiding details from his personal life because he’s hiding some affairs that are connected to him or someone from his family. Maybe his love life isn’t something he’s proud of.

mysterious man

Also, did he ever post anything about you on social media? Do you even have access to his social media accounts? This sign is a good indicator that he only sees you as a toy.

He will keep you on the side to have while he’s navigating his current marriage. Note that some men cheat on their wives and keep it a secret. 

9. He’s separated from his wife but still doesn’t mention you

Many married men start seeing another woman while they’re still married. If he’s over with his marriage for sure, why wouldn’t he mention you to his ‘soon to be ex-woman’? You can see where his true loyalty lies. There’s always the possibility that he only uses you as a rebound.

Don’t forget that before meeting you, he had made a promise to his wife, and look what happened. Can you be sure that it won’t happen again?

The first thing to do with your partner is to build an emotional connection. Everyone can feel some kind of attraction, but you can tell that your relationship is on an enviable level when you build an emotional connection.

8. If you’re pregnant, he forces you to get an abortion

When a married man gets into a relationship, he has to be responsible for his actions. If you’re pregnant and he forces you to get an abortion, don’t you see that he doesn’t love you, doesn’t care about you, and doesn’t have future plans with you? 

signs a married man is using you - he wants a pregnant woman to get an abortion

If he doesn’t want a child with you, it’s an obvious sign that your married man wants to use you. End this romantic relationship as soon as possible.

7. You think he has other women too due to his body language

It’s logical that if he has one mistress, he has other women too. Maybe he’s looking for a married woman to feel less guilty. Remember, he has a wife at home. He’s in a committed relationship with her. He’s cheating on her with you. Why wouldn’t he be unfaithful to you, too? 

Mention some other women and see how he reacts. Does his body language change? Men sometimes think that they can hide their actions and behave like everything is okay, but their body language exposes them.

Body language is a huge indicator of how people feel about each other.

Also, there are plenty of situations when a married man falls in love with his mistress (you, in this case). If a married man falls in love with you, there’s a huge chance he will fall in love with other women too.

6. He doesn’t answer your phone calls

If your married man hasn’t allowed you to call him ever, and when you call him, he doesn’t answer back or doesn’t reply to a text message, this is an obvious sign that he’s using you. He’s only spending time with his family. He also spends a lot of time with his wife even though he told you they separated.

rejected phone calls

This is just one out of many reasons why it’s hard to be in love with a married man. Remember, you will never be his number one.

5. His (ex) wife is always more important to him than you

When you realize his wife or ex-wife is always the priority in his love life, no matter how much your relationship progresses, be sure that you’re not really important to your significant other.

If this is the case, your relationship is toxic, unhealthy, and there’s no future for the two of you.

Check out if he’s still wearing a wedding ring. Maybe he has removed it because he wants to show you he’s not attached to his ex-wife anymore. Just remember that removing a wedding ring isn’t enough if you’re still not his number one.

4. He’s lying to you

We all know that love isn’t enough for a successful relationship. How? Well, if there’s no trust in a relationship and you’re spying on your lover all the time, the end of the relationship is around the corner. Remember, the most crucial part of your relationship is trust. 

he is lying

Don’t forget he’s lying to a woman who he has promised to be with for his whole life, which is his current wife. Why wouldn’t he lie to everybody else? Remember, a healthy relationship is not made of lies. 

3. He pays for your silence

Perhaps he presents you with gifts every time you become too furious and mention revealing the affair to other people. Maybe he’s directly offering or handing you money.

If you’re so committed to him that you’re willing to threaten to tell his wife about your affair, he could be willing to pay you to remain quiet.

The fact that money was exchanged in such a shady manner also reveals a lot about what you’re ready to put up with in a relationship.

If you’re prepared to pay for silence in exchange for money, you’re probably using him as well. Are you genuinely deserving of any more of him if you’re using him?

he pays for your silence

It’s a transaction when a guy pays for your silence in any form. This isn’t love at all. Transactions show that he doesn’t see, hear, or feel you as a soul, but rather as a choice. He sees you as an opportunity to get away from his duties and try something new. This isn’t a healthy relationship.

2. He has a history of abusing women

There’s a case to be made for giving people the benefit of the doubt. Gossip isn’t to be trusted, and it’s typically based on false information. If your married man, on the other hand, has a public reputation for using women for sex, money, or simply to pass the time, it’s a rumor worth paying attention to. 

Pay attention to this and don’t let him ruin your self-esteem and mental health by manipulating you. It’s not safe to build a romantic relationship with this kind of person.

1. It’s something you can sense in your gut

Your intuition is one of the most telling signs that he’s using you. Your body’s way of warning you to be cautious is your gut instinct. It’s a natural reaction to safeguard your mental and physical well-being. If you can’t shake the strong feeling that something isn’t quite right in your relationship, it’s time to look into it.

Signs a married man is using you – How do you know if a married man is unhappy in his marriage?

All of us wait for a moment when we find the love of our life. Getting married is a beautiful and exciting experience. You spend a lot of time celebrating with your loved ones and you expect a love life with your partner to be the same as a celebration. A relationship should be full of happiness and laughter.

signs a married man is using you - sad man

Unfortunately, sometimes marriage doesn’t turn out as we imagined. You can notice when someone’s unhappy in a marriage. Here are some of the signs.

5. He always makes excuses not to be at home

This is like some kind of rule. No matter if it’s a married man or a married woman, when someone is unhappy, they always find a reason not to stay at home.

Even on holidays, an unhappy person will try to avoid spending time with their partner. He only needs to send a text message that he won’t be home on time for you to know something’s up.

4. He jokes with his single friends and tells them to never get married

Remember, sometimes you can find out more about someone through their jokes. Usually, people try to make jokes about everything that makes their life hard. In this case, he’s indirectly trying to tell you he made a mistake by getting married, so he has an extramarital affair.

signs a married man is using you - joking with friends about marriage

To be honest, it’s selfish of him to say things like this. Men cheat on their women instead of divorcing them, which is totally wrong.

3. He makes jokes about leaving his wife

If he often jokes about leaving his wife, it’s clear that it’s not a joke. He’s trying to express his strong feelings via humor. People who do this expect others to ask them if everything is okay, so they don’t have to be the first to mention their problems.

man joking about marriage - signs a married man is using you

This is one of the clear signs that he’s hoping for his marriage to end.

2. He parades around with his career and money

Men like to parade around with their money and their career because it’s the only thing that makes them happy. If he has a bad relationship with his wife, he probably wants to forget about it. Therefore, he tries to make up for his lack of happiness with money.

1. He’s cold and formal around his wife

If you notice he’s cold and formal around his wife, it’s a clear sign that he’s unhappy in his marriage. He’s probably staying in his marriage because of their kids (if they have kids) or he doesn’t want to admit to others that he made a wrong choice.

It’s not wrong for a couple to divorce if they aren’t happy in their relationship. It’s wrong to be married and have an extramarital affair.

FAQS – What happens when a married man falls in love with another woman?

When a married man falls in love with another woman, it generally signals that something in his marriage isn’t working. He and his wife may have just grown apart, or they may be going through a difficult time. Whatever the situation in the marriage is, different men will react differently.

Signs a married man is using you – What to do after a breakup with a married man?

This is one of the most common faqs. After seeing a lot of signs a married man is using you, it’s good for your self-esteem and mental health to leave that toxic relationship. You will need some time to recover from this heartbreak. Give yourself enough time. It’s not easy to deal with this type of heartbreak on your own, so seek some help. 

Remember, you have to be aware from the beginning of a relationship with a married person that there’s a giant chance you will end up being heartbroken. Of course, no one deserves that, but selfish people don’t worry about others feelings.

Don’t seek anyone’s validation if you have done the right thing by ending a toxic relationship. Do what your heart tells you to do. You deserve the world. Not some fake crumbs of love.